Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Apocalypse No

Mr. Two Monkeys and his friends over at Drunken Zombie ( got an Advanced Reader's Copy of Sleight of Hand by Peter S. Beagle and they let me read and review it for them. You can check it out right here.

They also gave me an ARC of this:

If Mr. TM and I had kids, this would be their first book.
I am pretty positive that some sort of apocalyptic event will occur in my lifetime, not because I'm a lunatic, but because all of the other lunatcis in this world have worked themselves into an anticipatory apocalyptic frenzy. Our favorite shows, movies, books, and video games are post-apocalyptic in nature (with the exception of RuPaul's Drag Race - you go, Stacy Lane Matthews!). The apocalypse is all anyone can focus on anymore, whether it comes from zombies or infection or the moon coming closer to earth. 2012 is swiftly approaching and we've all worked our panties into such a tight bunch over it that our very fear based actions will precipitate some horrible event.
I'm guilty of apocalyptic fantasy - I won't deny it. I dream of a world where I would have to hunt my own food, where fuel was scarce, where I was facing danger at every turn and there was no garuntee I would live to the next day. In this world, I wouldn't have to work eight hours a day, or answer a cell phone, or answer to authority I didn't agree with, and my ability to reason would mean more than how nice I was to rich people. And in my mind, this is awesome.

I get to bring my cats, right?
In reality, an apocalypse of any kind would be awful. I know I probably wouldn't live through it. I'm pudgy and have a bum ankle. Any sort of moderate to fast moving zombie would find me easy pickings. I refuse to eat bugs, vegetables, the cats, or human flesh. I need to shower daily - sometimes twice. The idea of a world without modern plumbing gives me a migraine. To live in a world and never hear the soft swish of a flushing toilet again... Lost was awesome, but they never showed anyone crapping on the beach. You know they had no choice, at least in season one.

I want all of the benefits of a post apocalyptic world without any of the drawbacks. Call me a hypocrite. I want a more exciting life but for someone else to make all the hard choices. I guess I want apocalypse lite. And I want to go back to normal when I'm tired of it. The removal of it all in fiction and television is what makes it so appealing to us as we sit in our offices daydreaming about firing shotguns into rabid zombie hoards.

Remember this game? It kind of sucked...
But at the end of the day, we get to go home and go to sleep without fear.

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